im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Randomize
