i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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