Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
