You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize
