she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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