Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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