I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
