Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
We had sex on a dog bed..
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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