yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
