I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just made out with a guy for $7.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize