They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
