Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Randomize
