do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize
