You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
