I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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