dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
