Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
