i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
