omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
