Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
