adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
