I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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