I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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