what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Randomize
