oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
