By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
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