I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
God, you're like boner-b-gone
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
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