You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
