I'm really into asian looking animals
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
