So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
