i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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