Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
