The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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