I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
We are all done wearing pants today
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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