I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Randomize
