At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
