I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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