So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Someone signed my nipple.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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