i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
