Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
