I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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