honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Randomize
