So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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