you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
This is classic penis vs brain.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
