I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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