Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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