id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
