Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
