Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
