I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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